Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Now how am I gonna do that?!

I have been asking God what is the last thing holding me back? What is the lesson I am suppose to be learning before he lets me go forward? He has been telling me but I keep dismissing it because I don't know how I am going to fix the problem. So I keep telling myself "Nah that can't be it." However, when you keep asking and the answer doesn't change you finally have to accept it. My problem is my ex. I am not bitter for anything that has happened in the past. The fact that he keeps doing the same things continuously is what gets me going! He owes me a lot of money. The problem with that is he does not seem concerned at all with getting me paid or the fact that the kids need the money. He is too wrapped up in having fun and what he wants. It dives me nuts!! It also brings out my anger. How do you practice forgiveness? If only it was as easy as putting all my anger into a balloon and letting it float up to heaven far far away......

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